2008 - gone forever

It is new years day, and both Tom and myself are at home, saving the pennies and instead have chosen to richen the neurons (pun intended considering Tom is doing psych, and I have opted for a brain subject this year.)

While 2008 brought less travel and new experiences than previous years, it has taught us a few things. Not all are appropriate for this blog, but we have been tested financially constantly this past year, and are so grateful that we actually manage (sorry for constantly screaming poor, however!).

Memerable events of 2008:

- Visiting dear friends in Holland and their two gorgeous boys, while dusting the cobwebs off my old violin to experience a bit of Bach once again.

- Tom passing his 2nd year with flying colours

- My return to uni: many long study days, weekends etc. only to feel completely invigorated by the entire process. Bring on 2nd year!

- The interesting state of affairs of the Belgian government (or lack thereof!) Yves Leterme didn't seem to last too long before he screwed up.

- Not all was good however. Tom and myself lost a few friends this year including two of my colleagues and one of Tom's korfbal team mates (from a few years ago).

- Visits from some great Australian friends and family: Nicky & Liz (visiting twice!!), Mum and Emme, and one night with Benj in Ghent. AND visits to London (2 or 3 times - can't quite remember. Always great to see Kym and Benj.)

- Our road trip in Italy. Highlights not the major cities, but included a personal chianti wine-tasting in the hills of Tuscany (Rufina) and our late night drink and left-wing anti-Berlusconi political chat with the receptionist from the hotel in Bologna.

- Zomer van Antwerpen. Free movies in the hangar by the river, the summerbar with Cava, Sangria, Tapas and world cuisine. The absolute beauty antwerp has to offer is indescribable - even if for only a month or two a year! Come home Anna and Sabien!

- Buying my wedding dress

- The surprise bachelor night for Tom in the Ardennes - especially for the few of the guys who survived the trecherous mountain biking journey.

- Tom going for a last minute trip to Munich for the Oktoberfest

- Tom breaking his arm (funny that all of Tom's highlights have something to do with booze. Should this be something of concern???!)

- And last but not least. The late discovery of House MD. Have become totally addicted to the American Hugh Laurie, and still can't quite get enough!

There are probably more, but these are those which came to mind most quickly!

Have just received my new course books for my year - with focus on the Brain and its behaviour. So now I'm off to read about addiction; perhaps I should just let Tom write my assignments this year, considering he has already been down this track. More time for House MD that way!

Happy new year to all of you, my dear friends. XXX

Control yourself. Take only what you need from them.

Thanks to one of my current faves: MGMT... very different sound, but right up my alley!

No photos this time - just a rant and rave (yes, it's October, the leaves have turned brown, the mood of the average Belgian has turned a little more sour, the knives have proverbially come out in some places!). While everyone in Oz is probably wearing teeny tiny little singlets and the aircons have once again been switched on for the long summer, the days here are getting dramatically shorter and a definite autumn feel reminds me of the long cold months to come!

I feel that I am relatively safe to use this blog as a so-called journal as to the 'happenings' in our lives, but am still a wee bit wary as to what goes on at the place I spend the majority of my life: work. I had quite a psychological chat to Tom this evening about the 'work-dynamic' and relationships formed and lost there. I have worked in enough places to be aware of the need for a hierachy everywhere, but I don't think I have ever worked anywhere with such a prominent 'clique' group and the remaining outcasts/independant workers (can you figure out where I am?!!). Don't get me wrong, I am not phased by this situation, but admittedly do become jealous when other colleagues are praised and encouraged because they are in the clique while the rest of us don't. This is my own self esteem issue, but who doesn't like encouragement?!!

I had a chat with the big boss a few weeks ago, (nothing in relation to the above) and he was so full of praise I am sure I went red, so why do I need encouragement from my peers if eventually the big boss is happy? Without being too cocky, my first year has gone well for me. I have thoroughly enjoyed studying again (even if the stress levels have increased) and the boss is more than willing to encourage me to keep going. BUT I have to bite my tongue around my HOD, because she constantly tells me 'you should feel yourself lucky' when I mention the study. It's just easier to keep quiet than get sarcastic remarks. SO, only one person at my work even remembers I am studying, and I feel a little bit selfish in wanting others to ask "so Ingrid, how is the uni work going?" but have realised once again, that Belgium is just another world to Australia. I often miss Wiggy and Therese with their constant support when I was at uni in my final years in oz.

Now I know I am nagging, but at least it is without the whiney voice, just the clittler clatter of a keyboard!

Em arrives in a week, am so looking forward to seeing my little sis - she needs this trip and her big sis and bro to look after her for a while. We have booked a show at Cirque du Soleil, then the following week, Tom and I will be killing ourselves in one weekend with I love techno, followed by Sigur Ros (quite a musical contradiction...)

Am off to finish my glass of Chianti (picked up while we were in Italy!)

Ein, zwei, drei, bier!

Perhaps it will be one of the last chances for us to have a weekend apart before the wedding (except for the fact that we are flying to australia on different dates!), as Tom has kindly headed east with his trusty sidekick Maarten for the biggest beer party in the world. I wouldn't have minded going, just for the novelty factor, but beer isn't really my thing, plus, my final piece of assessment is due on Friday next week, and I need to send it on Monday, still with too much to do! So now, I have found all possible nooks and crannies needing to be cleaned, all clothes have been washed, I will probably start vacuuming and mopping later, all in the good name of procrastination. I don't think I will quite make it to the ironing - so when this is all that remains, perhaps the review will be the lesser of two evils...

I hope not to get any drunken phonecalls in the following few evenings, but look forward to the photos which he will bring back with him!

Too hasty

No pickies this week... but only because I was stupid enough not to take my camera with me!

In between squeezing time in to finish my fifth assignment (cancer chemotherapy, in particular receptor tyrosine kinase domain inhibitors) it has been time to 'profiteer' from the most wonderful time of the year (I sound like a christmas carol!)

I managed to remember to be on time (actually, with a nudge from tom, because once again, the clock was ticking and I didn't notice) to meet up with Sabien and Anna in the 'Summer bar' of Antwerp. Basically, it is just a huge field that they convert into an outdoor café serving Cava, Sangria (and fairtrade wine and beer) along with exotic meals - all for a good price - for the entire summer. It is so easy to lose track of the time when the sun doesn't set until after 11pm, so at 1am we gradually made our way home.

Yesterday, I carved a huge chunk into the remainer of my assignment, and was looking forward to an 'inge' night at home (Tom had a ticket to see Beerschot play a team from one of the 'stan' countries), and I received a strange phonecall from Alexia (a colleague) at 6:30pm. "Ingrid, I have two tickets to Rock Werchter for tonight, do you want them". I was oh to stupid and hasty, and said "I would love them, but I am alone, without a car, so I can't". STUPID ME!! I called Maarten, and he was keen, but by the time I got back to Alexia, the tickets were gone. So, no Sigur Ros, Roisin Murphy, Ben Harper or Radiohead for me. That will REALLY teach me!

Today is taking us to a barbecue (yes another one). Just received a txt from my mum on Kangaroo island. Seems like they are living it up sans children! Why not?!!

dEUS this week

With the onset of the "alleged" summer months, the social calender seems to have gained a bit of momentem, but to the possible detriment of the studies...

This week has seen a long awaited catchup with Anna and Sabien - Anna was a classmate of mine in the last level of language school (who is incidently far and away more advanced than I am in dutch - I use the excuse that she is actually South African) and with her girlfriend, Sabien, they are preparing for their 'round the world trip starting in September/October. I dearly hope they can make it back to Australia next year, but will probably be hitching their way through Bolivia or something wild and exotic...

This appointment started out badly - I had already scheduled to meet Anna at a certain time on Thursday, but somehow it slipped my mind, and I turned up an hour late to the café. Thank god she was still waiting there.

Friday saw me visiting Ternat again, with fantastic hostess, Stefanie and her family. Spent a lot of time playing with her 1.5 year old. Friends' kids are just so much fun! Refreshingly happy when stress seems to build up!

Today, we incidently discovered that the Aussie male hockey team were playing against Belgium - basically in our back yard - for free, so we went along and lent our support to the green and golds. Wasn't much of a competition though, with a score like 6-0, but I did meet a couple of other aussies, and have been invited to the australian society gatherings (am a little conflicted when it comes to expat clubs. But I suppose it might be nice just to have a looksee...)

Tom has his following exam tomorrow: he is now half way through, and within a 'fat' week (as the belgians put it) he will be finished his 2nd year (fingers crossed). I will be boozing myself up at a work gathering on Wednesday, and hopefully enjoying a quiet weekend next weekend (enjoying is a little presumptuous - more like studying...) while my family celebrate my mum's birthday.

Not an interesting post, but need to keep up my diary :)

I've been trying to call you lately, I've been waiting by the phone

We haven't been to too many functions lately, so no photos to post this time, but thought it was about time to update the events of the past month!

I have now handed in 2 assignments (out of 5) and have 6 months remaining in my first year of study. Tom has 2 months remaining in his second year, and is aiming to have no "second sit" exams. Next year, he is able to choose his direction and has been to an info day to  help make his decision... As he already had decided, cognitive and biological psychology are still his favourites. But we will see what happens when it comes to the crunch.

 Weather here has been picking up - lots of sun (but still a bit nipply outside). I have started a 'start to run' course via my MP3 player. Basically it is a series of 27 lessons (3 a week for 9 weeks) where you do a series of short runs and walks between (to build you up for a 5km run). Have just finished my fourth week and lesson 13 is pending, but after lesson 12, I need a bit of a breather! My calves feel like enormous bricks right now!

So, this year is already pretty much planned with uni work and keeping fit! Not much of a chance for a holiday between us (which really is starting to bother me) but as Tom has the 'accountant' bone in this relationship, he has simply put it that if we are getting married next year, a few more pennies will need to be saved... whereas I am a little too impulsive and don't want my fantastic 6 weeks of holiday to go to any waste! Grrrr!

Am off to go shopping today: It was the intention to be a late birthday day for myself and another girlfriend, but has turned out that we are both too tight and are just taking her son to the hairdresser instead, while painting fingernails and cooking cake! May even watch an old rerun of the OC. May even spend some time picking out glasses... yes, went to the eye doctor (can't remember correct term in english - opthamologist?) and discovered that I have astigmatism of 180° in my left eye, causing me to be dizzy and tired... lefty is getting a little worn out from compensating! So, am off to find some lovely frames and contemplate the lenses for a little longer!

Kom Op Tegen Kanker

Been out of action for a little while, but thought I should mention what we got up to this past weekend. The Belgian government has been furiously raising money for an anti-cancer campaign or kom op tegen kanker by all possible means. So, on Sunday, Tom and I rode our pushies to Aartselaar (around 5km) to plant a 3 oak trees in a nature park donated by the local council. Each tree planted receives a name and all money raised is for the anti-cancer campaign. As you may see however, we were not so suitably attired... since we have no garden of our own, neither of us possess a lovely pair of galoshes and hense muddied ourselves up nice and proper!

Today, Belgium lost a very influencial writer, Hugo Claus - via the still unrecognised in oz, euthanasia. So, while Belgium is mourning for the loss of possibly the greatest Flemish writer/poet, my colleagues and I mourned the loss of a fellow worker (who incidentally died in the same hospital). She was diagnosed with a glioblastoma (aggressive brain tumour) on boxing day, and survived less than 3 months. A lot of us visited her for her birthday on Friday (43rd) but it was quite difficult to celebrate. Despite thinking that there may always be time after the initial diagnosis, don't be too fooled. I really need to get into a different field of work.

Tonight Tom and I are venturing off to a TD (T Dancé or student party) in Brussels, so I have wisely taken tomorrow off. I cannot seem to pull up the way I used to!

You came on your own, and that's how you leave, with hope in your hands and air to breathe

Well it's time for my yearly blog entry. As many of you already know: I passed my exams for the first time without failing any. Thus keeping my hopes up for a study-free holiday. Now, I just have to prove it wasn't a coincidence. I also experienced the best motivation by visiting my old job place right before the exams. That has given me strength in believing this is indeed the best choice I made. Nothing more fulfilling than seeing people being stuck on their desks for 8 hours a day under the tyranny of a boss "who means the best for his employees" and who does everything "from the goodness of his heart". Strange how these two things always seem to correlate with monetary benefits in his favor. For those of you who recognize themselves, I will be joining you anyway soon. Just let me enjoy my 4 hours a day of courses (tiring), discussing psych-subjects in the uni-bar ( women and sex) and believing I know how the world works (that's what you do as an 20-year old). To prove I am so busy: on an average I am reading 1 novel every two weeks.

I know life isn't always easy and we had to sacrifice a lot for my studies but despite my own efforts there is someone who even deserves more credit when I graduate and that's Ingrid. She is not only my motivation to strive for perfection but she has endured everything and is giving up a lot herself when it is not even requested. She has offered me a chance to fulfill a dream and is still the only reason why I am able to do what I am doing. There is not a day I don't realize how everything is because of her. I know I will never be able to thank her for this chance but I will try for the rest of my life. She knows how I feel but sometimes you just need to write it down. ( I could say this was written under duress to make it funny and be myself but for once I am going to let it go).

Stop me if you think that you've heard this all before

Longest time between posts. I have been slack. Not busy, not overrun with other engagements, not working long hours, not studying too hard. Just slack, down and stuck in a hole desperately trying to dig myself out of.

I don't know when it started - probably around 6 months ago (along with the onset of winter I imagine), but I am not liking 'where I am at' at this particular moment.

I have officially started an MSc. externally while still working which has been quite stimulating (two people studying in one household generates some interesting conversation, discussions and encouragement). Have almost finished my first assignment and am already ploughing onto the 2nd. So, I am absolutely convinced I made the right choice to return to study. You reap what you sow, right?

Work couldn't really be too much better. My absolute best friends in Belgium are my colleagues (which can be a pro, but also a huge con), my direct HOD is a true champion - so smart, professional (yet capable of many a dirty conversation) and not at all arrogant. My big boss, despite being a pathologist, does his absolute best to be a good boss, and I think a very reasonable one. I voiced my opinion about a few things today (quite colourfully too) and he is always keen to hear constructive criticism. He is even depositing a bonus into our bank accounts next week which for me is fantastic (despite hearing some people still complain that it wont be enough...).

Am very happy at home. Madly in love with the child I am going to marry. I still laugh every day, even if out of pity... but am unbelievably lucky in my relationship.

So why am I down? The only answer I can come up with is that somehow, in the past 6 months, my idealistic expectations to 'life' are not being lived up to. I have once again jeopardised my friendship with one person, and fear that it may be for the last time. But, I will take on board something she said to me, and attempt to use it to my advantage: Those people who work hard will not go unnoticed - they will be rewarded in one way or other.

I hope to be happier soon.

Alone, restless. Breakfast table in an otherwise empty room

Fourth winter christmas down... not so bad, not so great. Definitely no Morris/Christiansen/extended family/globe trotters any of the cousins pick up - type christmas. No matter how long I will be here, I am afraid to say that I don't think that it will ever feel like a real christmas to me. There is definitely the element of over eating, but no freshly caught seafood, no beautifully presented salads. The alcohol element is universal though, but there is no retiring to the beach to play volleyball or cricket or just lay in the sand and watch the active family members do so.

However, with that said, this christmas had a new element - the presence of a playsation and something called a Wii. So, we all took turns to sing along karaoke style with the TV (even Pepe had a go. The YMCA sung by a 75 year old Belgian can be quite fun!), then playing tennis and bowling etc. (even though only on the telly...). It was a little strange though - having the TV on all night was probably what got me through without tears. I think in the future, we are going to have to share our christmas' between countries...

Well it's been a long time, long time now

Since being informed last night, by my dear, daggy fellow bf (BF standing for something else than best friend, something horrible in Flemish...) that I have been horribly late with updating my blog, I thought I would smear some vegemite on some wholemeal cruskits (how do you spell that?!) and write a quite update while Tom exercises his brain watching some Jimmy Neutron on TV.

Since the 2nd of December... I have ripened to the colour of 27, with many a fantastic gift for this little princess. On my birthday, I was nicely treated by all concerned (but sadly surprised by some friends who had first forgotten, but quickly remembered) - mum and dad calling me at 3am Australian time (when I was born - lucky they still had jetlag from their trip!), and many kisses were given at work! I was welcomed home to an apartment full of balloons and streamers (with a theme of the Belgian equivalent of the Wiggles...) and lovely quotes pasted throughout all the rooms. We then ate at Tom's parents' place where I saw my gift - his sister painted a black and white portrait of the two of us (abstract). Will post a picture of it once I take a photo. VERY impressive gift!

From the 7th until the 10th, we were in the wonderful company of the newly engaged Tim and Tash (he popped the big question the night before we arrived!) so there were many toasts to be made (and being in wine territory, this didn't seem to be a problem!). Now the two of them will leave with interesting last memories of Tom and Ingrid... Tash has a new word added to her vocab - one I am sure will make its way into the english language... Marginal (adj. To be used when referring to yourself or another who does something so 'cheap'. For example, me saying that I cannot afford a €1 bottle of wine, but wishing to stay in classy accomodation is simply marginal. (This did not happen by the way!).

This weekend has also been quite packed - spent the whole day with the extended Mattheus family in East Flanders (belated birthday lunch with Pepe and Rosa) followed by seeing the rest of the family, and a visit to Koen, Stefanie and Willem on the way home. This afternoon, it's bowling with Tom and Nita (Tom's, Natalie's and Tom's mothers' birthdays...) Am looking forward to next weekend already!


View of the pyranees from Perpignon


Playing Silly Buggers on the Mediterranean


Tom on the top of Força Real

See the nation through the people's eyes, See tears that flow like rivers from the skies.

IF you have a spare €1 or AUD$1.69 it might be worth the small investment to download this from itunes (living Darfur from Mattafix). Every single cent raised (not profit, but raised) is going towards helping those in Darfur. This video was funded by Mick Jagger and filmed entirely in Chad near the border of Sudan in a refugee camp - so far as I know. Although with all the campaigning against what is going on I am failing to see or read of much improvement, but there is still a little hope surely?

Otherwise this week... I stayed at work late on Thursday with the 3 other usual suspects (Stef, Nathalie and Carla) and we treated ourselves to tempura/sashimi around the corner from work - gotto love the 'eating-out' lifestyle here; there are restaurants EVERYWHERE! Then on Friday evening, we had all decided to go to see BodyRox in stereo sushi (one of the bazillion clubs in Antwerp) so this included yet another gastronomical event earlier in the evening (although, eating at 11pm is also a luxury here - no longer is it the 9pm kitchen closed rule)!. So we danced for a few hours in the club, but by 2am I called Tom to come and get me because we were due to babysit the next day, and I didn't want to be an absolute wreck (am starting to feel a little old!). BUT, on Saturday, my whole day was disturbed because we weren't actually due to babysit - Tom had a surprise dinner planned for me (since my birthday is midweek) and we went out, with his parents to a new italian restaurant and ate until we almost passed out. Now it is Sunday, I am tired, and am looking at the mess we live in and have no motivation to do anything about it. Was quite content to watch a few episodes of Twin Peaks, when we received a phonecall to go and play a few rounds of squash followed by Maarten cooking for us! I can never say no to food, and squash. Although I can see me sweating a little too much alcohol, but it is a good way to cleanse/detox myself!

Next friday we will be boarding the luxury jet provided to us by the one and only ryanair, this time to Carcassonne (between the pyranese and the mediterrranean. I am sure by the end of our stay, I will be shedding a few tears, my dear friends will be heading home and ending their 3,5 year stay in Europe. I will miss them dearly - it has been such a comfort to have them near me, plus fantastic travel companions!

I can do anything I want because I look good in leather

This week has been quite a tiring and emotional one.
We made our way to Brussels last Sunday (only to get lost and do 3 laps of the Basilique - grrr!!) and were welcomed with open arms at Louis' girlfriend's family home. After a few minutes of uncomfort, this was quickly replaced by a huge cup of tea with lemon and some friendly happy chit chat (in French. erhm....)

The whole intention of our trip was to have some nice photos taken: Louis and his father in law are keen hobby photographers and have a huge setup in the garage, and he has been offering us to come for a good 6 months so we finally took him up on his offer (along with another classmate of theirs; Mieke and her boyfriend, Jornd).

After a few hours of some single shots on digital, Tom and I expected that we would make our way out to the local bakery and buy ourselves something, but since Louis' girlfriend (Daphnè) works at a bakery, they had already a huge delicious buffet planned for us to feast ourselves on. Made up of millions of soft cheese, italian fine hams, sun dried tomatos with capers and all sorts of different antipasti delicacies (not to mention the ever flowing vin rouge) we went back for more photos. After the digital tests were done, we moved to the precious analogue device - however, the photograhers were having some slight problems with the flash etc...

When it was my turn to take the stage, I suddenly felt pressure (typical ingrid style stress) and after a few shots, was unsure how to pose (although this was more about spontaneous shots) and acted like an absolute petulent child and just had a little 'model breakdown' I like to call it! But I think that Louis took some fantastic shots and we will definitely go back again.



Then, this week, while at work came the huge emotion spinner: my sister has offered to pay for a ticket for me to come home for Christmas. Apparently it is a 'big one' this year with all the Christiansen's and extended Morris's (apart from us...) and Emme (being in the high salary category) has kindly offered to fork out for a ticket. Two problems to overcome: Seat availability AT CHRISTMAS (ha!) and the fact that I have 0 days left until 1 January. The first problem was quickly overcome (although a little dearer than normal, at $2500 AUD) and not too steep, but the second problem is still yet to be decided. The belgian holiday system is different to that of Australia. Very complicated, but in short, you receive ALL of your holidays for the year on the 1st of January (31 for me). Then you plan your year around these days. So I have asked my boss if I could 'steal' 4 of my days from 2008) but he is afraid that if he allows it for me then other people will ask for favours as well etc. So I can understand him. All I have to do is wait until Monday, but in short, I am not getting my hopes up!

And to make this blog a little longer, I cut a chunk out of my thumb this week! Would enclose a photo, but it is a little yucky!

Let's hope next week will be better (starting today!). We are babysitting Natalie Flies for a few hours this afternoon, followed by an evening of partying drunk 50 year olds for Toms' mother's surprise 50th birthday party. Tom and I have elected to do bar duty (and will probably be standing there until 6am. Grrrr. These old teenagers!!)

Bones sinking like stones, all that we've fought for

After reading my whiney entries I have decided to add another link to a friend of ours who is bravely motorcycling his way around the world, just to show you all that some people truly do remarkable things!

In our relatively non-eventful lives, we welcomed Jean-Marie (for you Aussies, the Jean is pronounced like Jean-Claude Van Damme...) - a Toyota Yaris. Gust was starting to pollute and die a little too much for our comfort, so we sold him to a nice African man who was to ship him off to Guinea - probably to sadly house a small family. But hopefully will bring some happiness to somebody.

Other news... my sexagenerian parents have bravely ventured out of Australia (not for the first time in their lives mind you) to the wonders of South America. Despite being a tourist hot spot, specifically in the past 5 years, I am still quite proud that they are still stepping outside of the proverbial comfort zone that many people their age tend to stay within. Am not entirely sure how my father enjoyed his flights from Rocky-Sydney-Auckland-Santiago-Quito, but I am sure once they are there, they won't have any regrets. Plus, once they make it all the way to Patagonia, I know dad won't want to come back. I have a lot of respect for the both of them, attending Spanish classes (run by a native Columbian) for the past 6 months, preparing them for this trip. I do pity poor South American who tries to converse with my ultra Aussie dad (who refuses to pronounce things the way they probably should be) but am happy mum is on hand!

Back in België, we have also been dealt a horribly early and cold winter this year. On Tuesday I scraped a cm of ice off the car (in October!) causing many a swear word, while the onlooking workmen (putting pipes in our street) were just watching smoking their ciggies. Sooooo - I am hoping that we will have a white christmas, because let's face it, I don't think there will be many of these in the future. But also, there may be the opportunity for the once in 10-20 year chance to see the 'elf steden toch'. An outdoor ice-skating marathon through 11 cities through the Netherlands. Fingers crossed!

One Time one thing occurred to me: What's real and what's for sale?

We have now been engaged for a few months, the wedding will not be until 2009, but I still cant seem to control myself. I have never considered myself as a girly girl to get consumed in the wedding stress, but am now finding myself spending hours looking at dresses, rings and ideas on the internet. It has now come to the point where I am banning myself from being so selfish (at least until January next year) and focus on other things in the meantime!

Our wedding was originally just to be a quiet small beach wedding where the official dresscode was to include thongs, followed by a barbecue and much dancing into the early hours. It is amazing how quickly this changes into something more chic and elaborate due my lack of backbone from hearing everyone elses contributions. 'That sounds nice Ingrid... but won't your guests want somewhere to sit'? OR 'That could work, but since people are already travelling so far, don't you think you could treat them to more'? SO, I am starting to succumb. Not that I am really stressed over it (not yet anyway!), but I have just come to realise that people will always try to make you question yourself. I know that it is just human response, but I think this is the first time in my life that is for something big.

I have many friends who have had babies in the past year, and I know it is even worse then. All mothers will give their own personal beliefs on raising a child - breastfeeding is the ONLY way to go. How can you not breastfeed? Shouldnt you check the nappy? Surely you should wake junior from his nap - he must be hungry now. Why are you drinking that tea? There is caffeine in that! In my day there was no baby food in the supermarkets - we made it all ourselves.

If there is anything that I have learnt over the past couple of months, it is that every bride and mother has their own ideas as to how they wish to do things. The best thing a friend or family member can do is support them in their decisions. They may be strange, cheap, odd, easy or heaven forbid, different - but as long as nobody is really hurt, and the person making the decisions is happy, then what's the problem?

With all that biting, I know that people are just trying to help, give suggestions, and back-up plans - but rest assured, I am not a shotgun bride, I have 21 months to plan and would like to be married the way Tom and I have dreamt.

Words like violence break the silence

It has been an interesting week for us - financially... I will apologise in advance for playing the poor victim growing up in a luxurious society, so all my whining is really meaningless - however sometimes we all just need a vent!

Poor Gust needed a new choke this week - so I managed to drive him to the Garage (while stalling at every set of lights, then starting him up with huge revving to keep the motor running... had many interesting looks from the BMW, Audi and Mercedes drivers around me!) so after a few days, he received a new thingy in his choke and was completely better.... until he caught the flu again 2 days later. So he is back at the Garage (after getting sick in the middle of Antwerp - poor Tom's nerves!) and we dont know if we will ever see him again. So time to take the trusy bike everywhere again, now that the temperatures are already hovering around 10°C. It's going to be a long cold winter for this little whiner!

On top of this, I am having huge issues with the student entitlements in this country. Fair enough, Belgium boasts such a great education system - HOWEVER - you are only entitled to any sort of student benefits until the age of 25.

I have been more than happy to forgoe one income, eating out and changing our lifestyle in general, but when the national public transport organisations force a full time students to pay €300 / 3 months for a train ticket (as opposed to €60 for under 25 years and under) I start to get a little shirty. Especially in the inexistance of an 'AUSTUDY' equivalent. Ironically - Tom would be entitled to a 'scholarship' with his school fees and books paid for IF we didn't have a de-facto relationship - However, I would not be allowed to stay in the country if we didn't have a de-facto contract. Go figure.

So, yes, once again, my problems are luxury problems - but sometimes, just sometimes, I would like to breathe comfortably and not count EVERY cent we spend.

By the way - it wasnt all drab this week - I managed to get onto the radio last weekend. Thought that I would request a song, and didnt realise they would call me back for a chat. It turns out that being Australian does have some 'fame' benefits here. So the lucky people of Belgium listened to my damaged Flemish for a whole minute, followed by the lovely voice of Mike Patton and Faith No More with Midlife Crisis (my second choice actually, but they didnt have any James in their library. Scandalous!)

PS - our street is looking very bald...

City dweller, successful fella

As soon as it is over, it begins again... next week, 2nd year begins. So, freshly unrested, Tom begins Monday morning with developmental psychology followed by individual psychology and clinical psychiatry. Nice and heavy to begin with! And, this semester, he is looking at many a 6am start (to get to uni on time) so come Christmas, we will both be crazy!

Not much new happening for me - just preparing myself mentally to begin studying again in January, but more details, once that is finalised...

Had an interesting day at work today - discovered 3 secrets, (ALL good) but am bursting with wanting to everyone. It will ALL come out in due time (thank god for me and my coal mine mouth) and let me just say to all 3 of you - YAY!

To all of you who are interested... yes, we are engaged, but no, we haven't taken the time to stress ourselves out yet in any sort of planning. We have a vague idea as to where, and how we wish to be married, but when... dunno! I will let you all know in good time - especially those who will be travelling the distance. It is a slight dilemma for us, because now that I finally have made some great friends in Belgium, it is quite an ask for people to pay such a sum of money to see us wed. You do know that I would pay for you all if I could. BUT we do promise to put on such a lovely show!

To those Aussie readers - I will be calling on all favours to maybe billet some of our friends out...! Thanks!

I can fly, but I want his wings.

First things first - what the hell is this hype thing with Facebook? Why has it affected all of my aussie friends (self included) yet when I ask people here about it, they look at me numbly. Why do aussies have such a computer addiction (look how many people have blogs/myspace/facebook) yet here NO-ONE (except the really intense IT junkies) has even heard of them. Perhaps people don't seem to leave home for vast periods of time like they do in Australia - and hence the blog phenomenon but I am still trying to figure out the facebook/myspace addiction.

The first question that springs to mind is 'why are so many people spending this time online in Oz when the weather outside is ALWAYS lovely?!' Are we a lonely culture? Do we find solace in sitting behind our PCs rather than chatting to our spouses/friends/children etc.? On top of that, I find it a little bizarre (perhaps just a tad bit sceptical!) that a computer tells me how many friends I have! - And I needed permission from the computer to say that Tom was my fiance...

Ok - I am a little black and white here, and do find some of the gimmicky things quite fun - but when it comes down to it, despite these sites being 'social' platforms, aren't we a little more antisocial than we used to be?

Just a smallish bee buzzing around in my bonnet.

My love she throws me back a rubber ball

No photos this time...!

Have pretty much settled back here in Edegem - and to my surprise (nice surprise mind you...!) we have another public holiday tomorrow. YES - another one. This one is for the original mothers day (apparently) but I just think that the Belgians like to take advantage of anything which has an occasion attached and call it a public holiday. I shan't complain!

Have settled back into work, sort of. I don't know what it is - whether I am easily influenced, whether my mood is dependent on the weather, whether subconsciously I am somebody else, or if it is due to my huge amount of time off work, but strangely it feels different to be back at work. I am not feeling as dependent on my friends as I did leading up to me leaving, and I have managed to offend one of them with my oh-too-frank foot-in-mouth attitude (as many of you are aware, I list this as one of my personality traits in Oz). I think I have played it pretty safe here for the past 3 years, and must be still switched on in Australian mode. Mental note to self - different things offend different cultures...

Have had a realm of reactions after announcing (what a pretentious word) our engagement. Typical for traditional Belgians, I have received many lots of 3 kisses (not just one - 3 means something REALLY good!) but conversely, some people have brushed it off as being a natural progression, with one person even going so far to say that 'nobody gets engaged in Belgium anymore - it doesn't mean anything. People just get married'. Up until that moment, I was sitting up on a big fluffy cloud, but you can be sure that the proverbial cartoon villain with the bow and arrow shot that cloud from beneath me and I fell VERY quickly. Am over it now though - have had enough kisses to last a little while!

Otherwise, not much has changed - haven't seen much sun (except through the window at work for around an hour a day), Gust is still behaving, Tom is studying his bum off and I am counting down for our trip to London. (Yes, always need to have the following vacation booked!).

I don't know what more to ask for, I was given just one wish

We have arrived, landed safely and are back in our lovely little apartment with only one drawback - I contracted that god awful ekka-time flu (yes - I do believe it is the flu for the first time in my life - sick for 1,5 weeks and counting...). So the flight was long and I felt dreadful from being sick, plus feeling sorry for myself for straining my (lack of) muscles playing with Emme's footsal team (sooooo much fun!) and being punished for it 2 days later. BUT - enough whining...!

Onto other news the blog has not yet heard... for something completely old fashioned (according to the Belgians anyway...) - Tom and I are engaged! We had a very romantic trip up to Bowen and Eungella 2 weeks ago, and he popped the question on the beach at horseshoe bay (with Sigur Ros playing in the background) with me bursting into tears in utter surprise! Now in true Tom and Ingrid style, we have been enjoying our relationship for the past 5 or so years, so now we intend on enjoying our engagement for some time to come! NOTHING is yet planned except for the resizing of my ring.

Am slightly missing home today - especially because a lot is happening for my dear little sister, but am sure I will become accustomed to the Belgian way of life again soon.